Taking Holy Communion at the Altar of St Heston

In case any of you were wondering about that thing I tweeted on Sunday, no, I haven't suddenly converted to Catholicism. I'm still hampered by a personal lack of faith as far as mystical entities with omnipotent powers are concerned, so that's not likely to be happening any time soon. As a matter of fact, I tend to have a lack of faith in most things, but there's one area that I've never lost my faith in, and that's food, glorious food. In particular, when other people cook it spectacularly well (thus saving me the hassle), and have the creativity to combine unexpected flavours in successful ways (thus surprising me pleasantly).

So, as some of you may have discerned from Monday's hint, I had lunch at the Fat Duck on Sunday. And yes, it was fantastic.

I'd been wanting to go ever since I read Alasdair's review a few years ago, but it was always just something to include on a dream list, and nothing I'd ever considered seriously planning for. I wasn't alone in this, as several friends always said the same thing, usually after watching Fat Duck proprietor Heston Blumenthal on telly (although not in my case, as I've never actually seen him on telly — I don't have a telly). I've lost count of the number of times his name came up in conversation, prompting the immediate response, "I must try the tasting menu at the Fat Duck one day!" followed by hearty agreement in every direction. Nothing ever happened, but I was content to dream.

A couple of months ago, Nikki told me she'd decided to organise a trip to Bray, and asked if I wanted to go. Of course, I immediately said yes without even thinking about it. Hadn't I been daydreaming about this very thing for a couple of years? Later on, it started to sink in just how much I'd committed to spend on a single afternoon, and I started wondering if I'd made the right decision. If I was going to spend all that money on eating posh food, wouldn't it be more cost-effective to eat out at several restaurants instead of just one meal? Wouldn't I just be paying for all the hype, and how could it possibly live up to all the hype anyway? It's a lot of cash to drop on a single meal, and what if it had been built up so much in my head that I came away disappointed?

These are the thoughts you're all probably having about the idea of trying the tasting menu at the Fat Duck, too. They're not unreasonable thoughts to be having, especially in our current financial climate. However, at a length of fifteen courses, the tasting menu is the equivelent of several three- or four-course meals in other places, anyway. And, as Nikki pointed out, at a length of fifteen courses, it breaks down to less than a tenner per course, which is no more than you'd pay in most restaurants, and in fact quite a lot cheaper than you'd be expected to pay in some gastropubs. But how many gastropubs have three Michelin stars? How many have any Michelin stars? And how many gastropubs successfully do such amazing and inventive things with their food, or leave you thinking so much about the process and culture of what it is you're doing when you sit down for a meal?

So, yeah. It's expensive, but it's actually not that expensive when you start to break it down. Where it gets expensive is the same area it always gets expensive: the additionals, like drinks. Fortunately, Billy decided to take one for the team, and order the matched wine menu as well (this comes in three price ranges, the cheapest one of which is just shy of a ton). The rest of us — me, Nikki and Chris — opted for a single glass of wine each, plus plenty of sparkling mineral water¹, and the opportunity to pass Billy's glass around whenever a new wine came along (thanks to Billy's generosity in being willing and keen to share). I won't be able to offer you any tasting notes on the wines, but I will say that they all seemed very well chosen, with each course getting a completely different drink that not only complemented the food of that particular course, but often complemented the food in the next course too, and were also delicious on their own. A regular source of amusement was also the ongoing change of glass size, with some being regular, some smaller, and one being almost the size of my head.

On the recommendation of the charmingly French² and always-smiling sommelier, I chose from their massive wine list a glass of 2007 Chateauneuf du Pape from Domaine de Beaurenard (in a normal-sized glass), a deliciously light and crisp white which complemented all the dishes very well. Nikki and Chris opted for a 2004 Pinot Gris from Rolly Gassmann, which was a slightly more full-bodied wine, but also sweeter, so I was glad to have chosen the wine I did, as its light crispness was a good palate³ cleanser between courses.

Speaking of palate cleansers, this is going to be a long post to read through if I don't break it down into more manageable chunks, so I'll take this opportunity take a break there and let you do the same before we move onto the meal itself. See you back here soon…!

¹I'm so used to ordering tap water in restaurants, because I hate the way they gouge you on the cost of mineral water that tastes exactly the same as stuff from a tap, that I almost said, "no tap water is fine" out of habit! But it wouldn't have been sparkling, which is not something I ever drink except in posh restaurants, so that was nice. Although five or six bottles of the stuff can add up…

²In fact, all of the staff were charmingly French, something I'd read about but forgotten.

³Petty annoyance. Yes, that's spelled palate not palette or pallet. People get that wrong all the time!

This is pt.1 of my Fat Duck restaurant review.
Read all the parts here: part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5